Why I Am The Way I Am

I recently held a contest on my Instagram where I posted three quotes, and whichever got the most likes/comments would be the one I would write about. 

The quote that won, was, “We mature with the damage, not with the years”.

The three quotes I had posted (the other two being, “I’m sorry, but I no longer apologize for being me” and a longer one about “feeling shitty” (read here) all resonated with me on a very personal level, but the winning quote hit closest to home. Here’s my take on it, and my personal experiences with it. 

I’ve been stared at since birth. Growing up as a kid with a pretty obvious leg disability, I’ve been subject to the curious eyes of strangers basically since I was born. This wasn’t exactly “damaging”, but it definitely helped to shape me. Instead of having a low self-esteem because of it, I chose to use it to put myself out there and show I was just as unique as anyone else. 

Being raised by my parents, and going through their divorce. Again, not something “damaging”, but it aided in the discovery of the “real me” when reached the age where I was able to stay making independent decisions. Once they separated, I began to realize how my parents worked as individuals, without the influence of each other. This created some rifts at times, but ultimately, again, led me to discovering exactly who I was and what I stood for. 

I was a people-pleaser. This meant that I was constantly doing things to benefit others, and I didn’t really care about if I was into it or not. One of the best decisions I ever made was to stop doing this. It caused me to lose some friends, but I need to make sure I’m doing things that were good for me as well. 

Going through depression. Depression is not an emotion, it’s a mindset. When I was 17-18 it was the worst it had ever been. I let it consume me, and it didn’t heloves that I was surrounding myself with the same people. Once I started trying to be more positive and realizing I could get out of it on my own, I did. And I’ve never been better. Depression is a terrible thing to have, but it’s not impossible to beat. 

I’ve always been someone who has been told they’re mature for their age, and I know if to be true. I don’t think maturity comes from age. There are plenty of people I know who are older than me but have the mentality of a toddler. I believe maturity comes from the things you’ve been through, and how they’ve changed you. But hey, that’s just my opinion. 

What do you think? How do you define maturity? What things have you gone through that has changed you into the person you are today? Tell me in the comments! 


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